Just This Is It

 By Rev. Cathy Toldi

Our Zen ancestor Dongshan practiced with Master Yunyan for some time, before departing to visit other teachers. Right before leaving, he asked Yunyan, “if I am asked to describe your reality, how should I respond?” After a pause, Yunyan said, “Just this is it.”

I think about this teaching often as our shelter-in-place days turn into weeks and now months. Who could have imagined such a time?

I tell myself, you need to write on your blog! Yet up until now, I haven’t, because I fret about wanting to write that perfect thing. I read all these other Buddhist teachers offering such helpful teachings, and I, too, want to be helpful. But when I ask myself, what can I possible say? the best I can manage right now is “Just this is it.”

Whatever is happening, in your room, your home, your yard, your neighborhood, your mind, your heart: just this is it. And it’s actually all there ever is, except usually we are too caught up in our affairs to notice what’s really so.  But now, so much has been stripped away. We have a rare opportunity to actually bear witness to the truth of our lives.

Those who know me know I love to wander about in nature, near and far. I would have been in Arizona and New Mexico at this very time, going to a workshop and visiting friends. But this month, and last month, and the month before, my “mountains and waters” are a daily walk to the beach, and my garden. My plants are getting so much attention this year that they are bursting with riotous bloom.  

In this week’s dharma talk, Beata said something I’ve been thinking as well: we’re all in a practice period right now. We’re living within a tighter container than most of us are accustomed to. We have way fewer choices. Our lives are simpler. We cook and eat regular meals. We sit, study, work. We see fewer people.  I was teasing a friend the other day who always wishes she could go away to the monastery. “You’re in the monastery! You don’t need to go anywhere else but right where you are.”

So rather than waiting until I have the perfect profound dharma words for you, I decided to just share my flowers, and Yunyan’s timeless words. Just this is it.